Hands All Over
by zehelred
Summary: "What else could you possibly want from me!" Where did that even come from. I'm over him remember? I'm sinking under. "I'm in love with you, Nico di Angelo." A collection of chapters/short drabbles or whatever it is you could call it that shows the couple of firsts experienced by Percy Jackson and Nico di Angelo told in a first person point of view. Prequel to Overexposed
1. Chapter 1

/INTERMISSION/

Okay, guys, this is Zehel_Red speaking. I'm just gonna be sneaking in Geexao's POV here for a bit.  
He's kinda offline right now and asked me to do the whole intro bit.

As you can see, this set of short chapters are kinda like the prequel to our on-going songfic entitled, Overexposed.  
(archive-of-our-own-.-com-/works/3386303/chapters/7408328) (Just remove the dashes)

The same system goes with this fic, it's inspired and titled per chapter by songs from our favorite band Maroon 5.  
Geexao is in charge of Nico's and I'm in charge of Percy's POV.  
The fic doesn't really affect the main storyline much as this would just be focusing on our favorite couple's first times. (yeah, any first time you could think of. Probably. Most likely. lol) So you could consider this as a standalone, but at the same time an accompaniment for the main story since it happened in the same timeline as Overexposed.

The order of uploads are different here since GX would upload first before me and we'll be doing this alternately.  
So that's about it! Let's go back to GX's portion

\- ZR

/cut/

this is an intermission / or our alternate headcanon ending for BOO.  
Zehel_red and I decided to make an intermission before we suddenly drop in the "heavy feels" in our story  
this is payback for not updating last week since we were together last weekend.  
-dont ask why, i just decided to go to his place and sleep and cosplay-

Anyways, i wont be leaving any cheesy messages or banters with him on this note.  
Haha :D i hope you guys enjoy and thank you for the comments and kudos :D  
you guys are precious :)

* * *

N I C O

Not Falling Apart

I'm feeling alive just being around Will Solace, I felt like a hundred skeletal butterflies were resurrecting in my stomach fluttering their frail wings. Just as I was about to go with Will, I was stopped dead on my tracks because of a loud familiar voice _whooping_ through the air.

Over by the hearth, in the center of the common area, Percy Jackson was grinning over something Annabeth had said. She laughed and playfully smacked his arm. There was this tight feeling around my chest, like it's getting harder to breathe. Like someone was clenching my heart and a small painful thug keeps prickling around my stomach. _At least he's happy. I think it's time for me to be happy too._

I glanced over at Will who's patiently waiting for me to follow him back at the infirmary, "I'll be right back." I stared him square in the eye, "Promise on the River Styx and everything." He nodded and smiled at me, "A'ight I'll be waiting." I strode off to where Percy and Annabeth were talking, obviously happy about being together again, grinning like crazy. _I can't win you over her… can i?_

Percy smiled at me, with that dazzling American-boy smile, like there wasn't even a war happening, like everything was suddenly okay again, like there was no worry, like we were normal people. _No wonder I fell so hard for this guy. But I'm not falling apart, I must compose myself. Shit. Get yourself together di Angelo! Just tell him!_ I snapped back to reality with his voice "—ust told me some good news. Sorry If we I got a little loud."

"We're gonna spend our senior year together," Annabeth intervened, "here in New York. And after graduation—" "College in New Rome!" Percy finished while pumping his fists in the air like he just won the lottery. I can't walk away, I can't talk, I knew this was pointless, I'm not falling apart. I'm gonna get what I came here for, must stay strong. "Four years with no monsters to fight , no battles, no stupid prophecies. Just me and Annabeth, getting our degrees, hanging out at cafes, just enjoying California—"

_You must not cry, you must stay strong._ I urge myself over and over again, I hear my heart screaming, asking me not to hurt him this much. This is too much. It's just. He destroyed everything. But, that's just what I needed. He'll be just fine, he's okay, he's happy being with her obviously. I'm just a nuisance, a child he needs taking care of… but hearing those words out of his mouth, those plans they've already made. The future they're both so eager to face together. How could I possibly be in between that?

"And after that—" Annabeth kissed Percy to stop him from yapping and that was the last straw for me. He was saying something but my mind can't really follow anything after that kiss. "That's great," I said, _styx I hope I don't sound so bitter._ Surprised that I could say it this calmly, "I'm staying too, here at Camp Half-Blood". Hoping to get a reaction from him, but all I got was a high-pitched over excited, "Awesome!" I stared at his face, taking in his features, hoping once again that he'd see me as I am and like me. _Woah where did that came from?_ His sea green eyes, his charming grin, his ruffled black hair. Somehow Percy Jackson seemed like a regular happy teenager enjoying the peak of his youth, not a mythical figure. Not someone to idolize or crush on. He was a dream, a happy dream I can never attain.

"So," I forced myself to speak through rusted vocal chords, pushing away tears, "since we're going to be spending at least a year seeing each other at camp, I think I should clear the air." I strengthen myself as the words slip my mouth.

Percy's smile suddenly wavered, "What do you mean?" he asked me.

I sighed, closing my eyes, exhaling all of the nervousness in me, pushing myself to actually get through this, one time. Then I'm done, I'll say my piece then I'll go away. "For a long time," I opened my eyes and locked my obsidians with his sea-greens, pouring all of my feelings in every word, "I had a crush on you, I just wanted you to know." He looked at me, then to Annabeth, as if to check that he'd heard me correctly, he was looking at me like he wanted me to repeat what I've just said. But I can't, it took all of my last remaining energy with it. He stared back at me, flabbergasted and obviously stunned, "You—"

"Yeah," I snapped back, visibly wanting it to be over quickly, "You're a great person. But I'm over that. I'm happy for you guys."

"You . . . so you mean—"

"Right"

My eyes flew to my right where Annabeth's gray stormy eyes flickered with delight as she gave me a sideways smile. Well that's a relief, I never knew it would be this hard and easy.

"Wait," Percy insists. "So you mean—"

"Right" I assured him again that I meant what I said, and that it's done, I'm over, I've moved on. "But it's cool. We're cool. I mean, I see now . . . you're cute, but you are not my type."

He gave me a shocked look, his mouth agape and his eyes wide, "I'm not your type . . . Wait. So—"

"See you around, Percy," I dismissed him and turned to my right, "Annabeth." Our eyes locked, as if sending a secret message to her to take care of Percy, she raised a hand for a high five. I hesitated but obliged. Then, turned around to quickly walk back to where Will was standing, patiently waiting for me.

As I walk towards Will, who was smiling and waving at me, the tears in my eyes fell. I was a broken mess when I reached him. He was asking me what happened when I was inside the campfire but I refused to talk, more like I couldn't talk I was sniffling, my tears and hiccups were being in a chorus. Will hugged me, gently patting my back and whispering reassurances to me until I've calmed down. I've never felt so embarrassed in my life.

That's it, that's the end of it. _At least, I told him. He's okay, he's happy now._ I'm going to move forward and start something new with Will, I think he's up to something. I gazed at him, he gives me a warm smile. "I'm sorry for breaking in front of you like that." I said, barely a whisper. He nodded, "okay, I'm actually really worried, can you please tell me what's going on? I believe you owed me an explanation?" he raised his eyebrow and smirked at me. My face feels so warm I think I'm almost getting a sunburn.

I told him about the time I was with my sister, Bianca. The labyrinth, the blue birthday cake, to Tartarus, the fight with Kronos… being in camp Jupiter, finding out he went missing, seeing him, with lost memories. I almost wanted to jump at that opportunity, but I didn't want him falling for me while he doesn't even remember who he is, it seems so unfair. Me getting taken to the deepest parts of Tartarus, being trapped inside a jar. Hoping that he'd be the one to save me… holding to the memory of his smile and tanned skin that smells like the salt and sea. . . Promising him I'd get him out of there and that I'd take care of everything even though I'm clueless. Doing dangerous "underworld-y stuff" just for his sake, because of a promise. Me meeting cupid and him making me realize the thing I've been hiding all along.

I am such a pathetic person, how can I even have the great Perseus Jackson, camp idol, every people, demigods and mythical figures, looking up to this teenage boy, much less a lover, _much less_ a friend.

Will clapped his hands in front of me, as if snapping me back to reality, "Okay, I have a proposition." He smiles, "I'll get your mind away from him. But I'm not really sure I could do so much, I'll need you to cooperate with me." I squint my eyes and search for the hidden answer his baby blue eyes. "What are you planning?" I asked him. He rolled his eyes, "Surely you could trust a doctor right?" he teased. "A professional doctor that is." I retorted back. He looks at me challengingly and laughed, "I knew I wasn't wrong about you. Come on, let's go back to the infirmary, you need to rest, I'll tell you what you need to do when you wake up in the morning." I sheepishly nodded, should I trust him? Do I know him enough to actually believe him and follow his whims? Probably. I can't bother Reyna or Hazel forever can I?

The night was full of horrors and nightmares, it's the first time I've asked to stayed with me while I'm sleeping inside the infirmary, I closed my eyes and dreamt of the things that happened this week, it's so hard to believe, but then again, being sons and daughters of mythical gods, goddesses and mythical creatures nothings more out of the ordinary anymore, well maybe a son of hades tending to the injured people inside the sickbay. When I woke up, properly refueled and rested, I took a bath, wore my sneakers, hip tight jeans and black shirt, I was still adjusting at the first day we hang-out together, Will showed me around the infirmary, introduced me to new people, they weren't actually scared of me, and I'm just over thinking. Ughh that is so embarrassing. They gave me encouraging words and smiled at me, some were obviously surprised that I'm walking the hallways with this sun-tanned nurse. Will showed me how to use some of the basic materials and equipment inside the infirmary's clinic and treatment section. It was tiring but it was worth it, I've met a lot of other campers, I never thought I could interact with them normally like this

On the second day, Will taught me how to put different kinds of bandages on different kinds of wound, how to treat infections by using herbs and wild plants, how to differentiate poisonous plants and edible plants inside the forest (this is pretty convenient given my habits.) I've noticed Percy looking at Will from a distance, _I think he wants something from him? But was too shy to approach him because he's feeling awkward?_ Will swatted my head and lectured me about spacing out in the middle of duty. We exchanged a few friendly banters and when I looked back at the spot where I saw Percy he already disappeared. Annabeth probably called him.

On the third day of duty, I started to enjoy being around Will, sure he was loud and a little obnoxious. But he's an excellent company. I keep learning new things every day. I was cutting up bandages when someone knocked at the door, "Dudes!" someone from the Hermes cabin was smiling enthusiastically. We both stared at him, giving him a questioning look, "What's going on bro?" Will said. "Chiron re-opened the training grounds" he hopped giddily. Will's face broke into a wide grin then he looked at me, "what's that look? I'm starting to hate it." I chided. He pulled my arm gently urging me to stand up, "Come on, we've been stuck inside here tending to the sick. I think it's time for us to get some sunshine and exercise." He looks at me expectantly. I shrugged and rolled my eyes, smirking at him "Doctor's orders?" he chuckled, "Yep. Now come on." We both stood-up following the Hermes kid to the training grounds.

The first thing I've noticed is Percy standing in the middle, announcing a few things. I suddenly felt uncomfortable, I wanted to leave. Will seemed to have noticed my distress because he lightly brushed his elbows against mine. "Can't concentrate cus he's here?" he asked. "Not quite." I answered. "I'm here don't worry, I'll be your partne—er sparring partner" he stuttered. I glanced at him, smiling. "Yep sure, I could use the things you thought me at the clinic after I beat your butt." I teased.

We were teasing each other when Percy suddenly appeared at my side, I feel as if my heart leaped to my mouth. It's as if he shadow-travelled to my right and just decided to look so damn hot, _where did that even come from. I'm over him remember? Ha ha ha_. I looked at the ground, afraid to look at him. "Nico, it's the first time I've seen you set foot on the training fields…" he said. Wow he doesn't want me here because he's afraid I might actually kill a few kids? "Oh, am I not allowed?" i snapped. He looks so stunned, "N-no.. gods Nico no. that's not what I meant." He stuttered. Yep he must be scared and creeped out now. Not that I care. I'm over him remember. _Or am i?_ screw the tiny voices inside my brain. Ughhh. "Uhm—anyway, since it's your first time joining camp activities and you don't know the rules, I figured we could s-spar? I'll teach you." He finished. I look at him as if expecting a big whoop, I was about to answer but Will said, "it's good man, we already agreed to be each other's partner. You can teach the newbies there, pretty sure Nico knows how to swing his own sword." He shrugged.

Percy was too stunned to speak he started to make out words and stop at the middle of each, as if too shocked to comprehend what's happening right now. After a few attempts to say "What?" Annabeth called from his back, he looked at me and Will, nodded and headed off. I raised an eyebrow at Will seeking an answer to what just happened. He just chuckled, "Don't give me the death stare di Angelo, I'd melt. Come on, let's spar"

A few days have past since the "sparring incident" and I have been noticing a lot of things,

for instance... Percy keeps on following me and Will when we head out to get some herbs and wild plants. Mrs. O'Leary barking at Will non-stop, eating his rubber shoes or leaving a huge dump on his ornamental garden. The water from the lake suddenly deciding to take life and splash said Apollo kid on the face.

But what hit so hard was the last incident,

Thursday afternoon, Will was on duty to look at the fence near the Lake if it's safe and if the kids who are playing around it won't be injured or fall into the Lake where the stubborn nymphs are resting. All I heard was screaming from a distance, the next thing I knew, Mia from the Hermes Cabin was frantically calling me for help, I rushed towards where the screams are coming from and all I saw was Will thrashing and gasping out for air then it hit me ... he was DROWNING.

I jumped inside the murky lake, swimming to where he's struggling, "Will! William!" I screamed. trying to calm him down.

I held him tight and gripped him around his waist trying to make him resurface with me. In the blur of screams and people surrounding the lake. I forced myself to paddle until we reach the surface. when we got there, he was huffing and throwing up, I kept on patting his back, rubbing circles around his shoulder and asking him if he's okay.

the next thing i know, Percy was pushing away the crowd to get a better look. "Oh gods, i didn't think they would actually do it." he was trembling while running both hands on his hair. "What did you just say?" I glared at him. "You? Planned this?" I stood up and looked him square in the eyes. This douchebag almost killed my friend, the only person not really afraid of me and has been my company for the last few weeks. And now he's ruining it? Can't he just lay off and go away? why does he need to do this to Will? Doesn't he want me to be happy?

"Perseus Jackson, do you even know what you just did?"


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, I think I'm gonna make this note short since GX already said what this intermission was for.

I'd like to say sorry for the readers who were expecting an update last week.  
Things got a little busy at work and  
I spent the weekend with GX, he just suddenly decided to drop by and spend the night over at my place.  
( We live far apart, so something like this isn't usual and just happens once in a blue moon.)  
As payback for leaving you hanging, here's a small flashback.  
We decided to use two different songs for Nico and Percy's POV this time.

Thank you for the kudos, comments and the support! You guys are awesome  
I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as you enjoyed GX's.  
Prepare tissues in case of feels.

Peace out!

ZR

P.S.

It's a little long, but there's a reason for it. We haven't really heard about Percy's perspective on things, so this is my take on it.

* * *

PERCY

STUTTER

_Whoop!_ I cheered after hearing what Annabeth told me, cutting the air much to my dismay and causing her to laugh and slap my arm.

I gave my ex-girlfriend a grateful look, both of us grinning like crazy at the plan she told me.

It has been a few days since we got back from Tartarus. Now, you might think that all was fine and "dandy" with me and Annabeth after we came back, but it wasn't the same. She felt it and so did I. By the time we got out of the Pit, we had a mutual agreement to silently cut off the relationship. There was no words exchanged, but when we looked at each other while we were trapped in the elevator of doom fighting to keep the doors together we just realized that we were better off as best friends.

It still hurt that we ended our relationship together, but for some reason, we felt relieved. Not the relief that we get by coming out of an unhealthy relationship, but a sort of relief brought by enlightenment. I couldn't explain it properly in words, but I knew that it was there. Like the weight of the whole world lifted on our shoulders.

When Annabeth slept in Tartarus for the first time when we first met Bob and when I got riddled with curses from the arai and fell into a short coma, I felt wretched. If it wasn't for Nico, neither Annabeth nor I would have been alive.

At first I thought it was just the horrors brought by Tartarus, seeing Annabeth and the others dying in this quest got me waking up from my dreams in cold sweat. I didn't know if I could ever get some sleep again because I was afraid I'll dream about those again. _I was wrong_. Nothing was more terrifying than dreaming of Nico possibly having died in the jar, being alone in Tartarus and being alone without a sister (who died because of me). I'll always wake up crying thinking that it was the Fates' way to remind me how wretched I am. How I've wronged every person who offered their help to me, ditched them after I'm done asking for their help, that they should be the one getting all the credit and not me. The person I've wronged most was no other than Nico di Angelo.

After we got out of the Pit, I noticed that I was more aware of Nico. That I catch myself staring at him a lot longer than usual. I thought it was just guilt eating at me, that I want to set things right with him. That I want to go over and talk to him. To start over. To look at his eyes until I drown in it. To hold his hand... to kiss him.

That's when it hit me.

He meant so much more to me than anyone else. Admittedly, more than Annabeth. The guy was practically the reason why I got out of both wars alive and I'm a complete idiot for not realizing that sooner.

My thoughts were cut off when I saw the son of Hades himself start to make his way towards us like my thoughts were the ones responsible for calling him over. I felt my heart try to jump out of my chest at the sight of him. _Holy Poseidon..._ what will I say? What if he notices? Should I tell him? No... that would be lame. What if he doesn't swing that way? That would be as awkward as Dionysus flashing his _podex_ on us and telling us to kiss it.

_Oh gods._ He's coming nearer. _Think of something, Jackson!_ I thought frantically, looking around for a way. A topic. Anything to talk about.

As usual, my mouth ran off before my brain could catch up."Hey, man" I said. "Annabeth just told me some good news. Sorry if I got a little loud." I instinctively looked at Annabeth for help. I didn't know how to explain it. It would sound lame and un-cool if I accidentally say _"Hey, did you know that I decided to go to college so I could at least be worth it to date you?" _How about a no? Even I wouldn't date myself if I say that.

"We're going to spend our senior year together," Annabeth started explaining. We figured I'd have a higher chance entering college if she helps me with my studies and help me become a Marine Biologist (or something else that has something to do with water)."Here in New York. And after graduation -"

"College in New Rome!" I pumped my fist like I was blowing a truck horn. "Four years with no monsters to fight, no battles, no stupid prophecies. Just me and Annabeth, getting our degrees, hanging out at cafes, enjoying California -"

"And after that... " Annabeth kissed me on the cheek - a friendly one like a sibling's-, effectively stopping me from possibly saying something that would reveal my plans. "Well, Reyna and Frank said we could live in New Rome as long as we like." It was a little weird being kissed like that after the break-up, but I was too excited to finally be able to live a good normal teenage life.

Knowing Nico has a sister in Camp Jupiter and he would probably stay there, I could probably focus on building up my relationship with him again, at least try to bring it back to how we were before Bianca died.

"That's great" Nico said, smiling a little. "I'm staying too, here at Camp Half-Blood."

That statement lit up an excited fire in me. More time to spend with him, then. "Awesome!"

I looked at him, studying his face for a while - his deep black eyes, his small but genuine smile, his messy black curls that are in much need of a haircut. Somehow, Nico di Angelo seemed like a regular guy now, not a child of Hades that needs to be feared. Not someone who should be isolated or pushed away.

I felt my heart do skip after skip, finding myself becoming lost in his eyes the more I stare at it. This is bad. He might notice-

"So," Nico started, pulling his gaze away from me, making me feel a little disappointed and embarrassed for being caught staring, "since we're going to be spending at least a year seeing each other at camp, I think I should clear the air."

My smile wavered at the words he said. _Oh crap. _Did he notice? Oh, great, Jackson! Way to go, numbnuts. "What do you mean?"

"For a long time," Nico said, "I had a crush on you. I just wanted you to know."

I looked at Nico dumbfounded. _Holy Poseidon. _Did I hear that right? The person I like just confessed to me. I looked at Annabeth, checking if I did hear it right or if my brain is playing tricks on me.

She looked at me with her gray eyes sparkling bright and gave me Nico a smile.

"You-" I started. Oh gods. What do I say? I'm not ready for this! I'm not expecting that Nico would be liking me back like this.

"Yeah," Nico said, "You're a great person. But I'm over that. I'm happy for you guys."

I felt my heart stop for a whole other reason. _What...?_

"You... so you mean -"

"Right."

I looked at Annabeth again, this time her face turning a little stunned. Okay, this is getting too quick for me to catch up. _Is he dumping me? _

Too messed up to have my brain function properly, I gave up trying to match Nico's train of thought. _Back up, please. _"Wait," I said, hoping that desperation wasn't present in my voice that time. "So you mean -"

"Right." He said again. "But it's cool. We're cool." He shrugged. _No, we're not. I like you._ "I mean, I see now... you're cute, but you're not my type."

Then I heard my heart plummet down the ground with a deafening crack. Felt like my heart was stomped over and over again as the words replayed again and again in my head. "Not you type... wait, so -"

"See you around, Percy" he said, turning to Annabeth to greet her bye. I saw her hold her hand up for a high five - I didn't know why but it was probably for having the guts to tell a person you like them, something I didn't have .

Nico obliged, then he walked back to where Will Solace was waiting for him, smiling and waving at him when he got closer.

I was going to confess to him, tell him I was sorry, tell him thank you. Tell him everything... tell him I like him. But it was too late.

For once, I was at a loss for words.

I couldn't breathe.

* * *

"Hey, man. Are you listening to me?" I heard Jason ask me while we walked around camp.

The next two days were a complete mess. I wasn't able to sleep at all the past nights, even going so far as to lie down the cold floor just to get sleep to come to me. It was no use. Every time I close my eyes I just keep seeing Nico's face, I keep hearing the words over and over again.

I looked up to Jason, noticing how his expression turned worried. This isn't good. I'm not being myself. I'm supposed to be helping get things back together right now, get things right. But I just can't focus on anyone else but Nico like my ADHD mind suddenly liked to function properly and filled itself with thoughts of him.

He said he liked me. With a "d". Past tense. What did that mean? Why haven't I realized it? Was it because I was busy trying to hide my own feelings for him? I found myself wanting to laugh at that. Wow. All this time I thought he hated me to the bone.

Now my brain decided to rewind and backtrack every memory I have of Nico, the way he asked if Annabeth was my girlfriend, the way he constantly rattled on an on with Mythomagic, when he had me promise to protect Bianca, when Nico revealed himself as a son of Hades just to get us out of the Labyrinth alive, when he was the one who suggested I try the Curse of Achilles so we could win the war. When he was the one who found me when I was lost. When he promised to lead everyone to the Doors of Death. All of those things... he did because he liked me, and there I was, focused on no one but Annabeth.

I smiled dryly at the feeling of my heart being shattered to pieces again. I'm becoming a masochist.

"Perce, are you sure you're okay?" Jason decided to shake me out of my thoughts, his tone taking in a whole new level of worry from the worry book.

I nodded. "Yeah, man" I tried to act normally. How do I even act normally? It feels all unnatural. "I-I'm fine. Just couldn't sleep properly."

"Nightmares?" he asked.

You could say that. Constantly thinking why Nico said those things and thinking where I went wrong and how I could have stopped it from happening... stopped him from turning towards Will Solace but instead of being with me. It was a living nightmare. "Yeah." I answered honestly. "It's nothing, really."

I tried for another smile, this time a little more genuine than I expected. Jason is a great guy, a full-fledged best friend and a really great listener. I was glad he was there with me while Annabeth and I try to lessen our time together now that we're just friends.

The moment I looked up to the direction of the strawberry fields, I noticed Nico and Will walking around camp, talking animatedly and looking like they're having a great time. I wondered how it would feel like walking beside Nico, talking like that with him over something we're both interested in. Stealing glances and bumping shoulders while we do.

My heart lurched from my chest when I saw Nico look my way, the smile on his face looking like he was teasing me. What a cruel joke... is this his way of torturing me? Knowing that after saying he liked me that I'll just end up thinking more and more about him, making me come crawling towards him.

I grit my teeth in annoyance. No. Nico isn't like that. He never was. This was just my bitterness making me think that he could do that. I tried to look back, let myself get hurt at knowing that all I could ever do was fantasize, but I couldn't do it. I felt... jealous. This is insane. This isn't me. What am I doing?

I turned to walk away, ignoring Jason's calls for me to come back. I stopped when I felt him jog beside me and grab my arm.

"Percy, you've been acting weird whenever-" he started but stopped. He must have noticed how I look like. "Dude, why are you crying?" he asked in a panicked tone.

_What?_

I reached up and really did feel my fingers return damp. Oh, great. I'm becoming weird. Why am I crying over this?

"It's Nico, isn't it?" he asked.

"Wow." I said, not surprised to see him be quick about it. Am I that obvious? _Then why didn't Nico notice it._ Shut up. "Is it that surprising?" I asked, wiping my eyes. I noticed Jason give a look that was close to recognition and hurt. "That I like a dude?" I give up. No use hiding it.

"What about Annabeth?" he asked.

I shrugged. _Oh, right._ They didn't know about us. We never told anyone. "...we broke up. Tartarus." I whispered. "I kept thinking about Nico. Annabeth knew."

I told Jason everything. The more I told him, the more I felt relieved and constricted at the same time.

Contrary to popular belief, realizing that I have feelings for Nico didn't make things easier for me. If anything, it made me more bitter and angry. There's really no one to blame here but me. I should have realized things sooner, maybe if I said it seconds before, things would have changed.

I'd be the one with him right now. I'll be the one walking beside him. Laughing with him. Spending time with him. I laughed again.

This is impossible. I'm living in my own fantasies. I'm getting desperate, even. I'd give everything just to have that sort of attention from him.

"Come on, I need a sparring partner" I said. I need to clear my head.

* * *

Turns out the spar was all I needed to clear my head off of Nico. At least just enough to get me functional again.

The next day I found myself becoming a little more focused. I managed to lend a hand in camp renovation from morning until noon, helped in building a few cabins and showing one or two Roman kids around the place.

Despite the personal dilemma I'm going through seeing Nico and Will together most of the time, I was surprised that I didn't notice how rowdy both camps were. I didn't expect it that Romans and Greeks together could live peacefully like this, purple and orange together at one camp. I found myself grinning at remembering how Chiron and Reyna announced the re-opening of the training grounds and the special game of Capture the Flag in honor of the Romans being our guests.

The announcement lifted my spirits a little more. Maybe tonight Nico would like to join in now that he said he'll be staying in as a regular camper. I could help him with a few moves this afternoon. It would probably be a good time to start making things right. If he doesn't like me anymore, then I guess starting out as friends wouldn't hurt.

Afternoon came, campers began ditching off their duties. It's training session, who wouldn't want a bit of normalcy back in their lives?

Being a head councilor and a praetor made me some sort of ambassador for both camps and the others decided not to allow me and Jason to take sides before the games, so it pretty much made us wild cards and all-around trainers for now.

I was teaching a few Roman kids some Greek-style moves when I saw Nico walk into the training grounds with Will. They looked like they were enjoying. I felt my chest do a little jumping jack at seeing him smile genuinely like that. _But to someone else._ I shake my head at the thought. Nothing's going to change if I just stay here and do nothing.

_Maybe now's my chance._

I straightened up and excused myself, picking up Riptide and heading over towards Nico. I felt a little out of place... like a third wheel or an unwanted visitor, but I steeled myself for it. _Don't stutter. Don't stutter._ I repeated over and over in my head. My heart was pumping against my ribcage, aching like a set of hot pokers were being thrust in it one at a time when I saw how Nico looked like he was ready to run away. _Great... now he probably thinks I'm a stalker._

"Nico," I started, trying to keep my voice from cracking. It was the first time I called his name again after the whole incident. It felt familiar and foreign to me at the same time. "It's the first time I've seen you set foot in the training fields..."

Then I saw his eyes turn hard on me like I said something that offended him. "Oh, am I not allowed?"

The words stung me like the air in Tartarus. I might have hurt Nico, but this hurt twice as much to be in the receiving end of it. _Face it. He doesn't want you anymore so stop pushing yourself into him. He never did. He never will. _Shut up.

I was supposed to back out, give him space, but my stubbornness refused to let me.

I swallowed back my nervousness, trying to act casual. Unfazed. Anything just to hide how I'm practically shivering from the cold stare he's giving me. "Uhm... anyway, since it's your first time joining camp activities and you don't know the rules. I figured we could s-spar?" I looked at him noticing the suspicious stare he was giving me. _Is this really how low our relationship got? He won't even trust me anymore._ "I'll teach you." I finished, a little hopeful that he'll say yes.

"It's good, man." Will interrupted, stepping a little closer to Nico and holding him close by the shoulder. _Thump. No. Don't touch him. _ "We already agreed to be each other's partner. You can teach the newbies there. Pretty sure Nico knows how to swing his own sword." He shrugged.

I was stunned. I didn't know what else to say. I tried my best, but here I was blocked off not only by Nico, but by Will, too. Someone who shouldn't even be involved in this. I felt a little bit of anger start to swell in my chest for the son of Apollo. No. Not anger. More of jealousy.

How can someone Nico just started to hang out with be allowed to spend so much time with him, moreover stand so close. Like he knew Nico more than I did. _Did you even notice he likes you, stupid?_ I felt my throat dry up. I tried to form a few more words. I didn't know what else to say or do to get out of this situation. _Come on! Think!_ Something. _Anything!_

"Hey, seaweed brain! Mind giving a hand here?" Annabeth called out from afar.

"Y-yeah. Coming, Annabeth." I whispered as I stepped back. It was sick. I was finding relief from probably sending the wrong idea to Nico. That I'm still in a relationship and- _Who are you kidding? The guy doesn't even know you like him_. _Quit being delusional._

I looked at the two one last time. I want to know what's going on with them. Are they dating? Is it because of Will that he dumped me? I want to know.

* * *

Dinner came in a little too fast. I couldn't do much in the training except for finding myself distracted by how Nico would sometimes end up laughing in enjoyment during the sparring matches. I couldn't help but feel guilt eat at me at wishing Nico could find that happiness with me instead of Will.

Throughout the training, I couldn't help but keep my eyes on Nico. The kid was surprisingly good handling a sword. With his hair tied back to show his face, I could see the perfection that was him. He was recovering beautifully, his cheeks are becoming a little more filled, not the sunken look it has since the war. He was having some of his pale skin color back than the ghostly green he had, his scars were starting to fade and his eyes looked more lively. Not the broken ones I saw when I looked at him back in Epirus. He was smiling, too.

I felt a sharp pang hit my heart.

I'd really give everything to always be with him. His attention, his touches, his smile. I'd give everything to live in a reality of being with him than fantasizing from afar.

I shuddered. I'm in too deep with him and I can't do anything to keep me from sinking under.

"Come on, man." Jason called over, tapping me on the shoulder and pulling me away from my thoughts. The hustle and bustle of campers falling in line by the hearth to make their offering to their godly parents rushing back to me.

Throughout the slow walk to the hearth, I could hear Jason begin to tell me about the day like I wasn't there with him to know what happened. I could hear what he was telling me, understand them but I wasn't much of in the mood to talk to him. Or anyone else. I'm torn. Confused... and aching. I know it's overdramatic, it's just been three days and I'm acting like a drama queen. But I need answers.

The hearth was now in front of me and I stared at it hard, almost glaring as if what I'm doing could actually draw out answers from it. I looked up a little and saw Lady Hestia tending to it. She smiled so kindly at me that it hurt, like she could tell what I'm going through right now.

_Sorry, dad. But I really need answers._

I raised my plate by the hearth and scraped a good half of my beef brisket and mashed potatoes into the fire. I looked up and followed the sparks of fire fade into the sky.

_Aphrodite, you said before that you'd make my love life interesting. Why are you doing this? Why can't I just have a piece of my life normally? If you're listening, help me. _

Putting all my desperation into it, I felt a little better. It was as if I imagined that Aphrodite herself was listening. I was about to leave the hearth with a light heart and get ready for the war games tonight when I saw Nico and Will walk inside the mess hall. Laughing and teasing one another. Then the next thing happened, Will held his hand.

Feeling anger and hurt flare up inside me, I forgot everything else. I glared at my food. Suddenly I didn't have much of an appetite anymore. I'm tired of this. I'm tired of everything else around me. Forgetting manners, forgetting everything, I dumped the whole plate in the hearth, surprising everyone around me and earning a deadly look from Hestia. I looked up at the sky in anger, blaming the gods and cursing them for giving me a life of one living hell after another. _Smite me if you want. I don't care anymore. If this is your doing then you're really doing a good job at it. Thanks._

"Percy!" Jason called out after me, grabbing me by the arm. "Where are you going?"

"I dunno. Just out of here" I only tugged my arm away and looked at him with a sarcastic smile. I couldn't breathe. I'm seeing red. "Food's _not my type_."

This is definitely not me. In most days, I would have been really excited in playing Capture the Flag, but instead here I was sitting down the bottom of the lake, staring at nothing but the darkness and the occasional fish that would see who's the lunatic sitting down the seabed. _Scram!_ I said telepathically.

It was cold, but I couldn't care less. I just need a place to cool my head, but yeah, not helping, either. I'm too wrapped up with anger and hurt to care that the campers might be looking for me.

The next thing I know, I saw a couple of nymphs swim towards me, their beautiful blue eyes gleaming in the moonlight. I was about to ignore them but then an idea popped into my head. Something so dark and chilling it was a little amusing. Then I smiled a wicked smile, a little too mischievous for my liking. _This isn't me, but I don't care._ My brain's chewing at me. I'm not thinking straight. _Drown these feelings. I don't know... Drown them. Drown him._ I'm getting scared of these thoughts coming to me, like a whole new person was coming out of me. As scary as it might be, I can't help but feel a little sort of relief.

"Hey, you know Will Solace, right?" I asked them and they nodded with a giggle. "You can choose not to do this, but... how about going in for a swim with him? I'm sure he'll like it."

* * *

The next few days, probably a week, I didn't know. I let my negativity and bitterness take the better of me. It wanted out, so I just did what it wanted. It started with the innocent urge of wanting to at least disturb the two once in a while, the next thing I know when I saw Nico and Will take their usual walk by the garden while I was out walking Mrs. O'Leary out, I had an idea pop in my head.

"Hey, girl." I called out, rubbing her chin that was resting on top of my head. "How about you greet Nico? I'm sure he missed you." I smiled when I was given a deep and pleased bark. "Good girl." I said and patted her jaw. "Go play with them."

Then I let her loose, smiling a little while I watched her wreak havoc in the gardens and giving one nasty insult of taking a huge dump by the garden. I almost broke out laughing when I saw Will panic. I felt a sick feeling of relief build up in me, but quickly pushed it down when I felt a little guilty for having done it. _Ohgods, I feel like a jerk. You are, you douchebag._

The next weeks I went on with the program, some of them small and unnoticeable, some of them a little more intentional. The one I liked most was when Will got sprayed on by the lake waters and ending up a spluttering mess. The one I hated most was when I left a banana peel in the middle of the mess hall, Will slipped but he ended up being caught by Nico in his arms. I did not like that. Not one bit. I ended up groaning and cursing in Greek much more than I imagined I could.

This is just driving me insane. Everything I do, everything I try to pull, the two just kept being together! I'm at my wit's end here.

Jason watched me walk back and forth the poop pile. He was busy cleaning the spear version of his weapon and right now he's looking more like an Amazonian Superman. "Dude, if you can't take it anymore then talk to Nico about it."

I groaned in frustration. I tried doing that. Didn't I tell him I tried everything? "I told you-"

"Nico has been chewing me out because of you. He's my best friend as much as you are and it's taking everything from me to not spill out anything." He said seriously, his hand not stopping in cleaning up the gleaming gold thing.

"Didn't I just tell you what he said? He doesn't _like_ me anymore!" I reasoned out, running a hand on my hair. "If I say what I feel right now, what would that just make him feel like? Rebound?"

As much as I want to tell Nico my feelings for him, I'm still considering the stupid "3 month rule". I wanted to wait, but seeing how Nico and Will are becoming closer each passing day, I'm torn between considering Nico's feelings and mine. Heck, the guy isn't interested in me anymore!

"It's not rebound if you tell him the truth." He said.

"Oh, that _"Nico, you've always been in my mind since I fell into the Pit. Romantic, right? Go out with me?' _truth?"

"That you and Annabeth are through." He said deadpan.

"Oh, I can say that." I said.

This time, Jason floated down the pile of rocks. Damn him for looking perfect like that. "Percy, man, why don't you just admit it?"

"Admit what?" I shrugged. Here I go again. Denial. Denial in every step of the way. "That I like him? Yeah, sure. Were you listening to what I just said?"

"That you _love_ him." he gave me a stern look. A brotherly and understanding one.

I turned to look away, feeling heat crawl up my cheeks at having someone else label my feelings for the son of Hades. I felt my heart thump loudly at that and my hands clench to a fist. This was just a crush, a simple case of puppy love... I should be able to move on, but why is it difficult?

"What do I have to put against Will anyway? He's good-looking. He's smart. He's cheerful. He's the manly man. The Adonis of the camp. He's Mr. Sunshine personified. He's the crowd favorite. He's a _freaking Doctor Who_, I'm -I don't know- a dodo bird or something next to him!" I groaned, my voice raising up in frustration and desperation one comparison after another. "He's... he's everything I'm not." I said in defeat.

I give up. There's no winning against him. He's someone who can give Nico what he needs. I should just back down and accept it. My chance with him was long gone.

I looked down, my vision went blurry. _Oh man. Am I going to cry again?_ It sucks to have reality slapped at you by your own realization. I've gone way beyond desperation right now. I've sunk down to hopelessness. This was worse than any war I've been on. Jason rested a hand on my shoulder, shaking me from my thoughts.

"Dude, you have no idea how Nico told so much good things about you. He's the one who showed most faith to you when we didn't."

I smiled at that. It lifted me up. I was about to say something when we heard screaming and shouting all the way to the lake. "What's going on?" I asked Jason in alarm. The lake. Was a monster found there? No... something worse than that.

"Help! Somebody!" I heard a shout from afar.

"Will!" It was Nico's voice. I could recognize it from afar. I felt my blood run cold from the sound.

_Drown them. Drown him._

"William!"

Shit!

Jason and I didn't need to look at each other. We sprinted to the lake. Panic rose through me. Memories, vague ones came rushing back to my head. In my time of anger, I said things to the nymphs. Jokes. All of them, but nymphs weren't known for their sense of sarcasm. Being the son of Poseidon, they grew protective of me. They'd do anything I told them even through passing. _Oh gods. What did I just do?_

"Move!" I said, pushing through the crowd with Jason behind me. Reaching the clearing, my eyes went wide at seeing Will sprawled on the beach coughing out water with Nico rubbing his shoulders and urging him to let it all out. He was okay.

Guilt came gnawing at me in the speed of light. "Oh gods. I didn't think they would _actually_ do it." I muttered in horror, fingers running through my hair in shock. _Shit!_ What was I thinking? Oh gods.

"What did you _just_ say?" The murderous look Nico gave me fed my guilt faster than anything else could. I could feel his anger seeping through me. "You?" he stood up slowly. "_You_ planned this?" It was an accident. I didn't mean it. It was something I said in passing. I was too stunned to move.

Everyone started backing up, most of them going away, but I was rooted on the spot lost in Nico's seething eyes. I've seen these eyes before. The time when I told him I failed to save Bianca. Anyone in their right minds wouldn't want to stick around with an angry son of Hades boring holes through them. "Perseus Jackson, do you even know what you _just_ did?" he whispered, his voice with a deadly edge.

I would have bolted from fear, but anger got the best of me. I admit that it was an accident. I didn't mean for things to happen. I knew I should apologize, get down on my knees and beg, but this was the last straw. To be accused so easily like this. "So what if I did?" I asked, my voice rid of the fear I'm feeling inside.

_Slap!_

I stepped back, the stinging sensation on my face jolting up my head and down my whole body and my eyes wide with shock when I felt his hand hit my cheek.

"You... are the lowest, most despicable person I laid my eyes on!" Nico shouted. "What did Will ever do to you?!"

I felt something snap inside me. The words rang on my head over and over, like a broken record. I couldn't say anything. I was wrong, I know it. I'm guilty. There. But it hurts to be called that. "...I hate it." I whispered.

"What?"

I felt my resolve build up inside me like a dam. The feeling similar to the one back in Tartarus came, tugging at my gut. It wasn't because I wanted to kill someone. I already know that. It was anger. Anger at the gods. Anger at everyone else. Anger at me. I've had enough being played around by everything around me. If this was some kind of reality TV, count me out. "...I hate it that you're with him all the time. You're not being fair, Nico." I said, straightening up and ignoring the pain on my cheek.

This time it was Nico's turn to be stunned. He opened his mouth to speak, but I beat him to it. "I did the pranks! I admit that, but it's not fair that you accuse me of something so quickly!" I let my emotions get the best of me. I don't know what I'm saying, but Piper said this is what love is. Emotion. Not rationality.

"W-why?" he stuttered, completely shocked to hear me say something not like me.

"Have you ever stopped and think, that maybe I liked you back? That maybe I would have wanted to say something before you left me out there hanging?" I croaked, my voice is cracking now. I can tell I'm near tears. I can't breathe and I don't care if everybody is staring right now. "You told me those things and didn't even wait for what I will say. I was jealous that you were with Will. Since I got back from Tartarus, I wanted to tell you everything. Tell you I'm sorry. Tell you thank you. Tell you that you were always on my mind. I wanted to try, but you keep pushing me away. Acting like you hate being around me, hating me for things I wanted to make up for."

Nico was looking at me with wide eyes and everything around me went silent like the whole world went in mute. "You..." I breathed deeply, my voice already straining and shaky. My vision was blurry now and I'm fighting to keep myself from breaking down. I smiled dryly at the situation. Wow. It's true what Thanatos said... Love and Death are more similar that I imagined. Here I am saying these things, but I feel like dying right now.

"You told me that not giving someone a second thought could be dangerous." Nico was now staring at me with a look mirroring mine. "I realized that and it was the stupidest mistake I made in my entire life not noticing how you feel for me. You... said those things to me, to give everyone a second glance, but how come you can't do the same for me?"

"I wanted to tell you how I feel, but you gave me no chance to talk to you. Did you give up on me that much to not even listen to what I have to say?"

This time, Nico was the one who ran his fingers through his hair, despair and frustration marking his features. Everyone right now was forgotten, Will, Jason, the campers. Everything. "What sort of chance do you want with me, Percy?" he voiced out a little strongly, his accent laid thick with emotion. "What else could you _possibly_ want?! I already gave you a lot and I got nothing in return!"

We're both desperate. I could feel it. I fought the urge to stutter or fail on my words. This was now or never. I stepped forward, my courage building up like never before. "You." I simply said. Nico stepped back. "I want you."

"W-what?" His eyebrows knitted together giving me a look of distrust and wariness, like what I said was just a big joke and an effort to make him hope again. Up until this point he refused to give in. I refuse to, either.

"You said you liked me, but you're over me now." I started. I searched his eyes. I didn't know what I wanted to see. Hesitation? Guilt? Anything. Anything that could tell me that what he said wasn't true. That everything wasn't over yet. All I saw was panic in his eyes. "If it's true that I have no more chance, tell me. Tell me you hate me and I'll back down. I won't bother you anymore."

This is it. My last card. I'm betting everything I have in this. I can't take it anymore. I need to know now. Because if I don't...

"Why?" he asked, eyes full of fearful hope.

I can't let go.

"I'm in love with you, Nico di Angelo."


End file.
